30 Day Challenge - Day 3

Here’s a news flash, someone asked me how long I have been single and I said “two years, what’s up?” and the first thing he replied to me was, “what? Does that mean you haven’t had sex in two years?” LOL really. I said I’m single for two years and that was the first thing that came into his mind. I was baffled. Well I guess that’s how people think about stuffs nowadays eh? No surprises there. 

Anyway, this 30 day challenge thing has turn into a god-knows-how-many-day challenge. I know I am procrastinating but on my defense I really have no idea what to say about drugs and alcohol, I mean, especially when I come from a culture where this two things are considered a big taboo, moreover I’m a girl which kind of mean that I should stay in the kitchen and make sandwich or something, definitely not out partying or drinking. I don’t do drugs so I’m just gonna pretend like this challenge is about alcohol. 

I honestly have no idea what to say, until last weekend where I went out with my group of friends from work. Great night and it got even better when I heard about a guy friend walked into the girl he was seeing shagging his roommate.  Well not literally like a good thing but it did put a light bulb over my head so, thank you (you know who you are ;)) if you’re reading this, and I’m sorry you have to walk into them like that. 

My point here is, that alcohol, as great and fun as it is, it is absolutely dangerous because it makes you lose control of things. You might make out with a friend and risk ruining your friendship, you might sleep with someone like your bf’s roommate (urgh! *roll eyes*), and you might even ruin your best friend’s birthday like I did last year. 

What happened you ask? Well, last year I went to Manchester for the bestie’s birthday and somehow I had way too much to drink. Not that I drink a lot (really, mum), but I just generally not that a good drinker and I was kind of upset at that time so alcohol seemed like a great idea. Obviously it wasn’t. Next day I sobered, had a talk with the bestie only to realized that I just made her worst nightmare come true. I hated myself for it and have pledged not to drink as much anymore. I know it’s not like a big deal drinking too much getting drunk and doing stupid things, they do say we only live once and I am really not THAT old. But I hate risking anything just because I want that moment of pleasure with alcohol, especially not friendship or relationship, if relevant. 

So yeah, I guess that concludes my opinion on drugs and alcohol. I would rather not drink than knowing that it’ll risk me losing things that I treasure. Though drinking can be fun sometimes when it pairs up with some drinking games. :p 

To end this almost pointless post, I leave you with some pictures from last Friday. 

Ending this post, like a boss. ;)

The good, the bad and the impossible.

Just a random ramble, not a part of the 30 day challenge.

Dear God please be so kind and answer my prayer,
Help me change the impossible make it work
I weep at the rain I shiver through the nights
I cry as the wind blow when the leaves flies

My heart aches as I walked forward,
Burden with the bruises holding me in the past
Dear God please grant me this wish
Help me change the impossible, like I’ve seen in my dreams

30 Day Challenge - Day 2

Day 02. Where you'd like to be in 10 years

10 years, 10 years seem like a really long time, sounds like it too, ten long freaking years. Truth is, sometimes I still feel like 13 years old Shing was only yesterday and all the memories of me skipping class going to the cyber café with the best friend comes flowing back, and then 10 years doesn’t feel that long anymore.

So today I’m supposed to talk about where I like to be in 10 years. I’ve been having trouble penning down my thoughts for this because to be honest, even I don’t have a clue. If you haven’t already know, I’m those sort of person that think very far ahead, like, really far ahead. But the fact that I don’t know what is my next step or where I want to be in 10 years kind of just makes me panic and wanna stop thinking about it. 

But okay, for the sake of completing this challenge I shall put aside my procrastination and do some serious thinking. Well, I think in 10 years, I’d like to finally have my own place, if I haven’t done so in the next two years. Career wise, I hope I am already in the media field chasing my dream as a news anchor, well, maybe then you’ll see 33 years old Shing on TV reporting news, how exciting. I hope 33 years old Shing stays as hot, though. ;)

I’d also like to see myself finally meeting someone that makes me happy. Guess I’m those sort of woman that wants stability relationship wise (mentioned it in the previous post, didn’t I?) so I’d like to see myself spending time with this person, maybe staying in on a weekend doing absolutely nothing productive but sit by each other reading a book or playing some monopoly or some sort. You know, the mushy cheesy stuff. Okay spare me, I just finished re-watching titanic so I’m kind of in that lovey dovey mood that thinks life is about spending time with the person you love. Plus, I’m into this sort of things lately.

In 10 years I want to see my parents being healthy as ever, my brother chasing his dream, whatever it may be, and that my grandmother still alive and kicking because seriously, I cannot live a day thinking I’m going to lose that woman.

So yeah, that’s 10 years for me. If you noticed, I focused a lil more on the personal and family bits. That’s my lesson learn and I hope I still remember this 10 years later, that family is always more important than anything else in the world, and no matter how crazy things are, we must always give time to ourselves. Too often we fight too hard, studies getting A’s work getting promotion getting bonuses, we fought so hard we forgot that life is not just about all this but about what we’ve done and what we see when we look back 10 years later. I hate to see myself as that workaholic that worked through my 10 years.

Oh well, it’s late now and work tomorrow. Sorry for the long draggy post and to make it up to you  I'll end this post with an (kind of unseen very exclusive) old picture of mine. Think it's taken in 2005/2006, that's the best I could find.

Super old picture of me no make up no Photoshop lol.

Night my love!

30 day challenge - Day 1

Ahhh. So day 1 I’m supposed to talk about my single life. 

To be frank I don’t know how to talk about being single, because I’ve never knew how to be single, really. A little hard to believe, although I’ve been on my own for more than 2 years now, I still doesn’t know how to be single, not one bit. Most of you would probably know, since I’ve been single I’ve been having random crushes on people and stuffs, maybe part of me is still chasing for love and trying to stop being single. I guess I’m the kind of person that likes to give, like give love to people. It makes me happy when the person I care about is happy and when you’re single, it’s hard to give love to people, as in I don’t know how to be happy anymore. Okay that doesn’t sound right but trust me, it is not like that.

Anyway, I really never knew how to be single, I still don’t know how. Right now, I’m going through this strangely familiar phase that feels like a dejavu from 2 years ago. The whole getting over someone phase. Strange. This feeling is absolutely familiar, yet so…well…strange! It’s like one minute I’m happy, and the other I’m feeling all empty and alone again thinking about that person that I cared about.

Okay I know how many girls are going to roll their eyes at me, especially those that believe that single equals to being free and do anything you want. Honestly I have to disagree, in my own way. When I was attached, I feel like I could do anything because there was someone that’s always there for me, and always there to support my every move and there to catch me if I fall. Now, I have to think twice even for the smallest thing because I know if I fail, I’m on my own. So no, I disagree that single is freedom because to me, the best feeling is when you know there’s someone waiting for you at home after all the shit that you have to go through during the day.

I know I’m supposed to talk about single life but I really don’t know how so I guess I’m kinda the worst person to share about being single. I’m independent, don’t get me wrong, enjoy being attach doesn’t mean that I’m any less independent. I just enjoy having someone to share my happiness and sorrows with, and to be someone’s whole world. 

Well, I’m running out of words, all I can think of is how much I wish things went differently and how life could be perfect, a little sad I know but I have faith, that someday someone will turn up and make me their whole world and love me like how I deserve to be…. not that I really deserve to be love anyway, but I’m sure you get my point.  ;)

30 day challenge

Saw this somewhere on Tumblr and first thing that came into my head was: let's start today.

and I shall.