LOVE? are you sure?

Such a significant day, today – the 14th of February 2010 with both Chinese New Year and Valentine’s Day on the very same day.

Guess I’m partially glad that this year’s arrangement is this way that I will have to head back to hometown and won’t be in the big cities for Valentine’s Day. Never really liked that day, anyway… Who will if you’ve been staring at couples being extra PDA, girls with big bunch of roses when you don’t have any for, say, bout 20 years of your life?

Oh great, I’m feeling a tad under the weather on the first day of Chinese New Year, and this is not good, they say Chinese New Year are meant to be celebrated in laughter and joy but, honestly, I don’t feel much joy in me today. Not in this slightly sick and emo state of mine. Hmmm…

I think too much, I guess, every time when something happens, I think and analyze and think again! Sometimes I just wished that my brain can stop function for awhile.

Oh well, here’s a story for Valentine’s Day.

I met up with my cousins yesterday to catch up on their lives, not sure if anyone remembered this particular cousin I was blogging about but she is currently 24, married with 2 kids and her husband is 20 years elder.

What about her? Right, last year I asked her so much, like why she gave her third baby away, why is she making herself suffer like this and being with a man that has nothing in life, not even a driving license. Then her answer was typical, she told me that she loved him, she told me:”if I don’t love him I wouldn’t have gave him 2 children.”

Well, fair enough, when someone brings out the word LOVE, there’s nothing much you can say or do anymore, true? So I told her to just stay happy and don’t ever regret her decision.

Maybe you could’ve guessed what’s next, yea; last night she told me that she wanted a divorce with her husband. Reason? She met another guy. Yea, how ironic. Exactly a year ago she told me that she loved him, and now, wanting a divorce for another man, some man she met from some magazine’s friendship column, haven’t she learnt her lesson… sigh.

No I don’t blame her because it’s true that humans are unpredictable, and we are just human that we cannot control how we feel towards people. I pity her children, though, they both are still so young, yet no one is willing to take them in. The father says if he divorce her, he will not want to take care of the two children, and the other guy, needless to say, refuses to be a step dad of someone else’s child.

I guess I more or less understand where is she coming from, she is young, and she haven’t seen the world enough and yet she is tied down with two monster and a really old and clingy husband, who doesn’t seem to be able to give her a steady life. Who wouldn’t want to get out of that situation, true?

When we asked her, so what’s next? Since her husband is not willing to divorce and she is still seeing that other guy, what are her plans next, with her and the children? She couldn’t answer, and when she was staring at me helplessly, I felt her pain; I feel her contradiction inside, to be with the guy she likes now or to sacrifice for her kids… I couldn’t help her; even I won’t know what to do if I’m in this situation.

All I can do is to hope everything goes well for this cousin of mine.

Hmmm.

Happy Chinese New Year to all, and have a great Valentine's Day to all!

=)